Why I Don’t Pray
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I find it ironic that the more I pray, in which I have prayed more in the last month than probably all last semester, I realize my desperate lack of prayer. I don’t pray enough. I don’t run to the throne room of God enough to glorify Him and petition Him for help in my daily trials. I seem to think that I can make in on my own and that I don’t need to rely on the Lord.
More likely, I assume grace and take it for granted, thinking that I can live each day without praying and that God will watch out for me anyway. I can miss my appointment with Him and He will forgive me. For if nothing can separate me from the love of Christ, then what do I have to lose. All need to do is do my best to live righteously and God will forgive me where I mess up.
The problem with that thought process is that all the righteousness I can try to produce is only filthy rags. All my “good†is evil, apart from Christ. Not only am I missing the depth of total depravity, but I am also missing the point of the Gospel, which is to save sinners so that they can now live reconciled to God through our Lord. If Jesus was completely God and He still prayed to His Father, then what an amazing example that is to us. I realized that I do not truly understand the importance of prayer as Jesus did.
Unless you think it might be too ironic (which I suppose you won’t), I will pray more for your more-prayer.
Yeah, I know what you mean. I realize often that I am subconciously thinking to myself: “Well, the less I can rely on God the stronger Christian I am”. Whoah, totally wrong there bucko. That’s what I have to remember. That Strong Christians are only the weakest, that rely on God the most .
Micah, I’m with you too! I was even amazed how God put a number of burdens on my heart the last month, which drove me to more prayer – and then when I saw the answers, how slow I was to 1) even recognize them as answers, and 2) praise Him for it!
Great post MJ! Prayer is kind of like holding a diamond when what you think you have is a cubic zirconium (sp?). As you learn the true value of the rock, you are more and more amazed that you don’t appreciate its value.
The last two months have been great for my prayer life, too! Lots to pray for and lots of answered prayer! I am with you, though. It is too easy to rest on the difference between last year and this year when that makes no difference right now. The best thing past accomplishments are for is motivation to continue in obedience!
Oh yea, I am glad to see some goodness percolating out of your brain on onto your blog! Thanks for the update!